oh lordie.

so here i am. sick as a dog. my doctor from hell says, yes, perhaps 2 more weeks of virus. its 2 pm. at 3, i have to be at the javits center for nyc shackmeet 2.0, to go to a comic con. wonderful, but i want to bail, because i'm sick.

sadly, nyranger (the official host) had to bow out as host, as he forgot to request off work on saturday. so he passed me the crown of thorns as host. people have messaged me their cell phone numbers. i drag my ass down to times square.

where ttyrazor calls and tells me the fucking FIRE MARSHAL shut people off from the comic con. i go into a starbucks and i order myself a chai. i call eric and i say "shit show" and hang up.

i want to say "i am a mouthpiece! i wish i could arrange shackmeets, but i do not have the clout! i am but a mere peon! do not do this to me! i forgot to fully charge my cell phone! please, got, do not forsake me and have it fucking lose battery!"

i sip my chai, and my throat hurts.

luckily, this shackmeet was small, and razor finds loboca among the horror that is the overflowing comiccon. mikecyb calls me and i reroute him to my starbucks. razor and lobo i tell to head to lazerpark. yes, last shackmeet was at lazerpark, but what in HELL am i supposed to do with three boys from the internet for two hours till dinner?

take them to an arcade. DUH.

i find mike, standing lonely on the street corner, and we proceed to lazer park. we play time crisis 3, and i realize how fucking awful i am at video games, and how fucking girly i act around men i don't really know. i mean, i even twirl my goddamned hair. we run through our quarters in 20 minutes. we sign up for a double mission of laser tag.

which rules. i mean, lobo was like, chief vest technican of a laser tag place 10 years ago. we own those teenage and prepubescent kids. i think i knocked one down. and kicked him, in the foggy chemical mist.

we leave, and meet portax, sergeon, and his wife sergeonette, at john's pizza. they drink beer, we eat pizza. i get high fives. they take pictures we laugh. we continue on to a bar lobo's sister recommends. irish place, with music loud enough that by the end of it, i have lost my voice. fucking sore throat. but they had framboise lambic, and i am happy about that.

at 10.30, we take our leave of the place, where someone (mike, was this you?) has sergeonette make a camera-movie of the six of us saying "i love the cock!" why oh why? i mean, i'm thinking, this is a video of me and five boys screaming that we love the cock. can i even start to tell you why this is wrong? no.

at times square, mike attaches to me, and returns to west harlem to sober up before his train. i don't know what's so alluring about west harlem, or my tiny apartment, but i give him a glass of water, make myself some tea that does not help my voice, and we chat till he ambles out around midnight, into the night to find his way back to upstate new york.

however. the perks of this night (more friends, right? guaranteed off the internet or your money back) include:

sergeonette said yes to a ddr party at her aparment. this is great. why? because now maybe eric will let ME have a shackmeet housewarming. and i get a ddr party! i think sergeonette was misled by me. "look, she's a girl! they can't be all THAT bad." but look at me. i'm a fucking shitshow. i just put on a good cover. i am actually playing for the other team. run away, run away.

lobo rules, and gave me tips about google, if i wasn't a pussy. maybe if he gets a job with them, i'd grow some balls and have him help me out. we'll put that as a bookmark for later.

they want more meets. maybe, next time, i'll either just peg myself as the go-to, or try and hide along the sidelines. regardless, the pheonix that was this meet gets a grade A-. i mean, it got me out of the house, right?\

edit: because i've heard word that this was negative (it wasn't i had fun, i'm just a cranky bitch) i'm linking yall to mike's write up. you can also see a handful of photos there, too.

http://orbit.vect.org/?nycshack2

so friday, i rode down to soho and met up with david, the guy i used to work with at DS. i'm really glad that after about 2 months, we're still friends. we had lunch, i came back. and maybe it's the nice weather, whatever, standing in the sun waiting to cross the street, i thought, "jesus. if friends could be made into something physical, i would be holding a misshapen circle of glass, hand-blown and cool, and that would represent my friends."

i realize, upon typing that, i sound like a fruitcake. but that's how i describe it. beyond joey, i think i can actually add david to that column. which means he is officially The First Friend I Made In New York.

for the rest, mosey on over to here: http://orbit.vect.org/?nycshack3 (thanks mike!)
my shackmeet saturday night. god bless sarah's soul for coming with me, although she didn't stay the whole time. god bless eric's soul, for coming with me. we played guitar hero, ds, some ddr till a neighbor told us to stop. we drank, ate pizza, talked. i left a bit after 1. and i think, by god, these people... they might be my friends, too.

i don't know how to quantify and qualify a "real friend", as i always seem to choose the wrong ones or somehow wreck that thread. i don't know if it matters if they consider you a "friend". i really don't think so. i don't know if it's one-on-one interaction, or face-to-face interaction, or if it really matters at ALL whether anyone agrees on your friend categories other than yourself. i'm of the latter opinion. since the age of the internets, i've counted my friends as friends, regardless of their form. can't say they've always been great choices, but whatever. live and learn.

so to nyc shackers, and david? i suppose i tip my hat. apparently, i categorize you as a gooberish-feeling glass globe.

which is a compliment.

dude. i just added a new cat to this blog. working out huzzah!

so yesterday eric and i joined a gym, nysc, the passport membership that lets us go to any gym we want. i was sad, because the gym was supposed to have a pool, but it was like... 10 feet long and as the guy said "for therapy". it would just be embarrassing to do laps in the therapy pool. i don't even know how that would work. probably poorly.

so i signed up for a 2 year committment because i know, barring moving, i'll be here for 2 years (isn't that a really redundant sentence?) i didn't have to pay an initiation fee, so it was good. eric signed up, too, but he was a bit miffed by the 2 year thing. he might cancel. i mean, he seems to only want to lift, and 86% a month is a lot of money. i bet we could purchase him a bench and stash it somewhere in the back of the bedroom if he'd rather that. if he's not using all the cardio and stuff like i want, why not?

and so, i'm unofficially joining the shack 6-pact, which was basically to get in shape before quakecon (though we still don't know when or where that's going to be). i'm probably not attending quakecon, and i'm not actually posting the pictures of my progression on the shack, as they do, but i will be photographing and holding myself to their standards. i'm starting late, but that's just due to lack of money beforehand. who knows. maybe i'll put the pictures here. doubtful. eric seems to have a thing about me posting pictures of my body in a sports bra on the internet. WONDER WHY?!

toodles.

really, joey, this post is for you.

you must, i repeat, must go out and buy a nintendo ds. 1. it has wifi. 2. i'm sure i can get you hooked on some ridiculous games. 3. brain age.

brain age, oh brain age.

brain age is a new game for the ds that tests, well, your brain age. it has a bunch of tests about counting and colors and math and memorization that is just MADDENING. seriously, it's like middle school all over again, and my worst nightmare. i found myself on the subway today trying to memorize the multiplication tables. i was like "7 times 9... 63. yes. 7 times 8... uhm... 56. shit, FASTER, elizabeth, FASTER."

and i just used a calculator to check those, because i didn't want to post wrong fucking numbers. that's just embarrassing.

seriously. i never was good at this shit. in fact, i've never memorized my multiplcation tables since that scarring experience in third grade where i tried to jump out of the car. (another day, grasshopper. you don't want to go there.) but the shack posted a leader board of brain ages. and although it's doubtful i'll hit 20 (someone already has), i want to be damned near the top.

i'm to 28 right now. and it took a lot of cursing and swearing. i can't say the word "blue" right, for example. and because the ds can't pick up how i pronounce "blue", it's hurting my brain age. and i want to kill the fucking thing.

i think if it weren't for the competition on the shack, i wouldn't have bought this game. i know i wouldn't have. 20$ is better spent on tetris, which i still need, food, or clothing. but i NEED to have a good brain age.

also, it has sudoku. which, if you've talked to me, i swear is the fucking game of the devil. never before have i tried it, because it just seethes with everything i hate.

i've already completed three puzzles.

god, i hate myself.

DAMN YOU SHACK!

so yesterday, loboca and i decided to go find us some furniture.

i got myself a chai, since i was dying of tired and nightmares, and then we went to 23rd and 6th-ish, to "straight from the crate". there, i found like 3 tables that would work for me. one little round thing with drop leaves, one pretty big dark table that opened HUGE, and a gateleg table that had folding chairs with it that stored inside it. also huge.

we also went to a futon place, where loboca considered the merits of faux-leather, and how, in nyc humidity, he would stick to it. we also talked about having a girlfriend is better than a dog, and where to get a microsuede couch.

afterwards, we came back to my apartment, where he reinvisioned my living room. i must actually flip where the couch and the tv are, and make myself a wall of bookshelves. all in all, he's a lot smarter than me.

today, i realized there was a "straight from the crate" 1 block from our work, so i brought eric there and we pretty much decided on purchasing the gateleg table, in a natural wood color.

i applaud loboca for being a superior interior decorator. now, he must pick out new overhead light, a paint color for my living room, and find me this tv/bookshelf set up that he has so amazingly put together.

ready? ready? GO.

hey yall.

in case you don't know, i'm down at my mother's till probably sunday night. i'm accessible, but of course, not really using tha internets.

i got the world's bestest present today, FO SHO, which i will unveil tomorrow when i have a digital camera.

shackers, you will appreciate. because a picture is worth a thousand fucking words.

roger doger, over and out.

compliments of bergman's shackpost, this is too funny to not post:

http://images.bestbuy.com/BestBuy_US/images/products/6875/6875358cv1a.jpg

if you don't get it, i'm sure someone will explain in comments.

woo. that was fun.

nintendo announced that the wii was going to be no more than 250$. 250$?! and shackers are speculating the 250$ pricepoint will be for a "premium rig" if they release 2.

should be dropping either turkey or santa day this year, and you can bet your little pink BOOTY i'm going to be getting me one of these shits. mario kart and smash brothers HERE I FUCKING COOOOOME!

3.56 pm, update on the hotness. look at this shit. HOTHOTHOT!

http://img45.imageshack.us/img45/6753/4520618uo.jpg

so i have a piece of shit phone. seriously. i got my phone back in boston when i was smitten with a boy that i shouldn't have been. he got this slider kyocera phone in blue and i was like "OMG I WILL TOTALLY GET THAT PHONE IN SILVER AND THEY CAN GET FRIENDS". i was 21 at the time. i have no fucking idea why i was acting like i was 12.

anyway. the phone blows ass. the boy went away, but the phone remained. (remember this lesson, women. it is a very important one for your lives.) after 3 batteries and 2 chargers, i decided, it's just a piece of shit. ration my calls to like, 1/2 an hour a day, and the battery will get through. fine.

but when, last week, it turned off 4 times of it's own accord in a day... the war was on. that shit don't stand.

so ebay seemed sketchy, it was too expensive to buy a new phone through a store without signing up for a plan, so i turned to the beloved shack and asked for advice, and said, "if you have a phone you'd like to offer up, i'm pathetic. please do!"

g0nk came through.

basically, he said that good had been done to him on the shack, and he was paying it forward. he priority mailed me the phone, and yesterday, i went to verizon and set it up. it's a motorola v710, and if you compare it to the kyocera slider, you'll realize, i was salivating. this thing is hot. 1. it has a camera, and a video camera (albeit not great quality but whatever), it has blue tooth, and, the charge holds and it doesn't turn off whenever it gets bored.

i'm in love with g0nk.

g0nk, g0nk, g0nk, how i love thee. let me count the ways. awesome phone: 1 million.

anyway, here are my pictures of the old, the new, and the hot miso phone love:

http://www.dahanese.com/phonio/old_and_busted.jpg <<< stupid kyocera of doom

http://www.dahanese.com/phonio/new_hawtness.jpg <<< g0nk is a saint

http://www.dahanese.com/phonio/willing_model.jpg <<< miso hates his life

so last night i had a shackmeet at my apartment. all-in-all, we went through a whole lot of liquor, played guitar hero, ddr, and played with our ds's... and... i had a excellent time.

here are my pictures (with captions). i'll post more as others put up their images:

http://dahanese.com/dahanese_shackmeet_060306/index.html

so last friday, mikey came and interviewed at my company. i heard his voice in the hallway and thought "OH GOD OH GOD DON'T LAUGH I HOPE I DON'T HAVE TO SEE HIM." it was super mature.

i'm betting 70% odds on him. since no one else is currently in the interviewing lineup, i'd say that's conservative... but you never know. something could happen and a more senior person could come in, be totally affordable, and beat him out. but senior people generally get bored faster. and anyway. he IS the coolest guy on the internet.

regardless. afterward loboca, mikey, sergeon, and eric came to the shake shack and we all got shack attack shakes (concretes but whatever they were supposedly drinkable) and shack burgers. and then portax showed up, because portax has a knack for saying he has to be somewhere else and blowing off my invitations, then showing the fuck up. i suppose that's flattering, eh? anyway.

loboca went back to work, because he's like that, and we went to midtown comics because eric wanted a green lantern ring. which... he actually wears... to work. it's plastic. and green.

i date this boy.

after that, i bought some pots for plants at work, and went home.

i have some great tonsil/work nightmares for you coming up, by the way. STAY TUNED!

compliments of chibijosh:

http://www.hairlessape.com/shack/headcopter.html.

wow, look at other shackers i didn't know reading my blog. hi kill virus (sorry, your name gets the no-numbers spelling).

okay, here's the deal. i don't know if i should change the font on my blog. i write my word documents in arial narrow -- that's my font -- but here, it looks kind of tiny. so here are the candidates:

make arial narrow bigger, like so.

change it to arial.

change it to verdana.

<<< insert your suggestions here with other fonts >>>

Update:

Comic Sans is eric's suggestion.

Also, Georgia.

Can everyone read Garamond?

And then there's tahoma. that's a good one.

so on the shack, someone asked whether people would take a flight on a space shuttle, even with the risks.

i replied VEHEMENTLY NO, as my #1 fear is space.

...i was heckled. (this isn't surprising).

someone then asked what #2 was. i replied, blood, followed by squirrels.

...i was heckled. (i definitely deserved it).

however, it was all worth it. as carazy made me this: http://www.dahanese.com/random_images/vampire_squirrel.jpg

i've been having really vivid dreams lately. i don't have time for both, so i'll write what i remember of my vampire one.

basically, i was in a nightclub-type place, with people i knew, including shackers. i was wearing like a fancy white bodice/corset/tank top thingie and a nice long black skirt. and a cape. yes, i know. whatever. it was a cool cape. and as i'm walking along this upper deck lounge area with a drink in my hand, something happens and the drink shatters. i believe someone knocked into me. anyway. a shard of glass goes into my left index finger, right above the second knuckle. i remember it very vividly, looking down, and seeing the blood, and realizing with this wave of nausea that i was a vampire, and i had no idea how i'd become one, and the fact that i was bleeding would make me want to feed, and i freaked.

i tore off my cape and i basically ran over, absolutely hysterical out of my mind, to my friends. and there was this hybrid-type person that was askedrelic there who stood up and kind of shook me by the shoulders. (his hybird was with a kid named alex hallowell who i knew in middle school. which is weird. but we're just going to keep going.) and i held out my finger to him and told him i was a vampire, and somehow this made sense.

there was a rush of panic and he was like "we're going to have to get you fixed up" and he went walking over to someone that we knew was an older, head vampire (who was on the bottom floor), and askedrelicalexhybrid said "i need to make her not a vampire" and the guy kind of laughed and told me to step into this circle, then.

so i stepped back and i was lifted up like 20 feet off the ground, and then 4 friends who were standing at the cardinal direction points around me were also lifted. and the head vampire said, "now tell me the four numbers of the vampires who made you."

and askedhybrid was like "what??" and in this tone, more demanding than explain, the head vampire let askedhybrid know that to turn into a vampire, 4 vampires had to do something to you, and they each had a code to unmake you. you didn't need all 4 present to undo it, just the code... and the guy assumed we had the codes, which he really wanted, because 2 of the vampires that made me were missing, and the other 2 in hiding.

i got dropped then, and in a frenzy askedhybrid was trying to get me out of there and i was so weak, and crying, and i said, "it's no use, they own this place. we'll never get out."

and sure enough, we were brought into a back room. i was so tired and worn and scared, but askedhybrid turned more into the personality of the asked i actually know, and started to try and smooth talk his way out of this. the dream ended by him reaching up to fumble through some glass cabinet and someone being like "do you even KNOW what you are touching???"

i woke up to a phone call, and the dream was so real i actually looked down at my finger, because it still felt like it should be bleeding from the glass.

oh god, i need to get more sleep. i want to die. i don't even think i'm actually awake right now. i believe i am dreaming that i am at work.

in other news, last night on the shack someone put up a post asking what you would do if you actually woke up, and the world had been infected and everyone was a zombie. would you kill your significant other (if they were a zombie) and go road warrior?

in this situation, the living shackers were all going to band together and party, but it got me to thinking: do you have it in you to survive?

me? i don't think so. i can't even kill a fucking spider. i have dreams about rabid squirrels and i freeze up. and zombies freak me the fuck out, since only 1 bite and you're basically done for. i think i'd hide in my house like a pussy and end up getting eaten in some horrific fashion.

unless i was rescued by the shack squad. then i could hide behind them and be the Stereotypical Girl. that would be pretty sweet.

i really gotta stop shacking so much. (this, by the way, will never happen.)

there's such a thing called shackhype. it's when enough people rant and rave about the wonders of a game till no one can resist buying it. this happens to me a lot. my nintendo DS (like the best purchase EVER) is complete shack hype. in fact, most of my technology is shackhype. anyway.

right now, there's a game on the horizon called dead rising. basically, you're a journalist and you go to a town for a scoop and find out pretty much everyone's a zombie. you go to the mall to try and find safety, and there are zombies (and some survivors) there. so you have the run of the mall to make weapons and fuck shit up.

i'm terrified of zombies. i suck at first person shooters. and this game is for the xbox 360, which is a several hundred dollar console. the game itself is 60$. i know, if the stars were aligned perfectly and money was no option, eric would play this game while i cowered in fear behind my hands and whimpered like a little girl.

however. i want it. so bad.

so where's the best corner for streetwalkers, because i have to turn tricks and start saving up.

hi guys.

you may have noticed i was trying to draw some mystery around myself. (no? oh. okay. i'm going to tell you anyway.)

about a month ago, a shacker named warcrow messaged me and said that he wanted to start a gamer's podcast. he wanted people with very different backgrounds to participate. he gave me a lot of compliments to butter me up, but in the end, he basically said i was a knowledgable and well-known girl gamer, and he needed some feminine DNA in his podcast, and invited me to join.

his name is mark, and he is our overlord. aside from myself, chris remo, an employee of the shack and gaming journalist, also rants with us. we ran a test two weeks ago, and last monday, recorded our first show. of course, as first shows go, it's rough, and too long, but all-in-all, i've gotten great feedback and some nice ego stroking (thank you endlessly first to eddie, then to greg, and then to marcus.)

we're up live on itunes now (EGAD.) i suppose i can't pretend i'm not some sort of uber-geek anymore, eh?

here's a link to our website. i'm supposing if this keeps on rolling, we'll get ourselves a real web address. subscribe, be kind, but please leave feedback, negative as well as positive. and do know that next time we will go no longer than 45 minutes, probably have more musical interludes, keep our news topics limited and on topic, and generally, have our shit 1 more week together than this one.

http://web.mac.com/heymarkd

as most of you know, at 10 pm on thursday i saw the opening of snakes on a plane. and, i must say, it was FANTASTIC. much scarier, realistic, and gory than i thought (i sat with my legs up on the seat the whole time, as did my sister, and most of the time we were cowering together, holding hands and whimpering) but it was great.

and one of the best things about the experience was the crowd. we cheered. we laughed. we hooted. we wooped. it was like watching the high school football game against your more dire rival. but it was for samuel l. jackson. when the famous line came on, you couldn't eve hear it, we were all shouting so loud.

after a rough week, it was the jolt of happiness and adrenaline and joy that i needed. i feel like i can tap back into that night and still feel the pure wonder of it.

the shackers also made it worthwhile. we had a whole row, right smack dab in the middle of the theater. before the show started, you could peer down and see a dozen faces lit by the glow of nintendo DS lights, talking smack to one another as we played over wifi.

but, really, i want to talk about how people were "disappointed" that SoaP made only $15 million opening week-ish. this is average for a horror movie, and movie execs were hoping for a $20-30 million mark because of all the internet hype.

i am very glad it didn't make that mark. i'm glad it did average, and didn't fail (i know it will make its money up later, and in DVD sales), but if it HAD flown out the window and made $30 mil, we would have been bombarded with viral marketing, shitty B-movies, and "Internet Hype" with a style of some 40-year-old in a suit and a comb over trying to recreate a single strand of pure Jesus Christ awesomeness because he wants to line his pockets.

you don't mess with god.

and my god resides in the miracle that was snakes on a plane.

today jed, emilia, and rob come from boston to play. which is awesomely incredible, as i haven't seen them since i left somerville. they arrive in about an hour and a half, and we're going to eat dim sum and then go over to loboca's place and drink and play games.

the hiliarity of this, of course, is that jed, emilia, and rob do drink, but do not play games. i just imagine the idea of them attempting guitar hero, or the ds, and i don't know whether to piss myself laughing, or die. all i can remember is them heckling me over puzzle pirates and WoW.

but the dread's fading, and i'm starting to get really excited. i'm off with mikey to look for more shot glasses and then buy some white russian goodness.

i know. it's sad. i really didn't want it to come to this.

i even inadvertantly cleared my data and instead of being like "goddamnit i have to go through all of them AGAIN" i was like "YES i'm going to silver coin at least all of them!"

it's so sad.

when people ask me what i'm doing, i reply something like "trying to figure out how to fucking measure the water accurately."

i really need to go get me some shoot em up games and stop being such a pussy.

ps. hi knitemare! ^_^

http://digg.com/podcasts/Played

this is my podcast. the wonderful shackers put it on up digg. i'm desiring to get it up higher in the rankings because... i don't know. i can?

i know just about 2 of you read this, but, c'mon. digg's awesome. sign up. digg my podcast.

i'll give you a cookie. :-(

so back in 2004 i got sucked into this game. i didn't realize how much i played it till the shackers started making noises about starting a shackcrew. i said i'd captain it. as of tonight, i think i'll have enough experience to become a captain. which is rad. also, ridiculous.

i was up till 2 am for the past 2 nights playing this game.

i am exhausted.

blog peoples.

i have to say, james blocke is my rock. like a little lego of awesome, i adore him.

we now know that he a. listens to played and b. likes strategy games. moreover, he's a shacker who appears to have at least at some point thought i might have dignity or clout. WHICH IS AWESOME IF HE IS A SHACKER AND KNEW ME BEFORE THIS BLOG.

also, he's stuck around, and commented, but yet not given into the two traps i laid seeking his identity on the shack AND the played forums. to have the will to stay back from those? you are a man of steel.

he has passed my IP checks, so even if he is a hoax, james blocke, you are now a 3D pixel fixture in the rendering of my life. when i think i'm too emo, when i think i'm getting in too deep, and mixing the internet worlds of myself together, stirring the pot, when i think "god, what if everyone in all realms of my life heard this? what then?" and i think of you.

but you know what? it's cool. you're cool. and my sister thinks you are cool. (here's a sidenote, sarah, in the ode to james blocke, an ode to you. you are the bestest ever. seriously. and i wouldn't be so downtrodden about how i think you think of me if i didn't always want to be the little overpriced diamond in your belly button which you haven't gotten since you are a lameass. which, in short, means that even if i think you judge me, really i think you are spectacular and you walk on water like jesus. who, according to a talkshow, has risen again and is trying to prove to the world he exists. which would be really fucking hard to do if you were jesus, you know? i mean, goddamn. anyway. i'm digressing, i love you.)

and james blocke? i love you too.

you little lego man, you.

woo dirty title. sorry, sa. you can delete that from your mind now.

anyway: http://orbit.vect.org/?gallery=46

so yesterday on the shack, people who went into macbook fulfillment on the 27th and 28th began getting their macbooks. i freak out, because i went into fulfillment on the 28th. i make mike leave at 6 pm (bless that man, seriously, he has the patience of a saint with me) to go see if we got anything.

apparently when he saw 2 ups slips on the door he was trying not to flip out himself. we tracked the package and it was an 11 pound something from Harrisburg PA. we decided it was nothing from my sister or from the coffee place, and since mike's laptop was 11 pounds shipped, it was a good chance it was my macbook.

so why was i not already at UPS? here's the crux: i was having dinner with dad, pam, and tim. at 7. and it was 6.40.

seriously, the ONLY REASON i didn't have mike miss dinner and pick it up was because i KNEW that was a REALLY SHITTY THING TO DO (and my father would yell at me and it's not worth that.)

so i sat through dinner, knowing i probably wouldn't get my macbook till monday because mike said the place closed at 8. but then at the end of dinner i called and they were open till 9.

we ran/bounced/gyrated our way to UPS.

the package came.

i kissed the man who gave it to me (not really).

i took it home and stripped it down.

we mad sweet, sweet love.

but in all seriousness, i was a macgirl back in the day. i remember my father giving me my performa when i was in 6th grade, throwing myself on the box and SCCCCREAMING. but, alas. father convinced me to get a gateway laptop in 9th grade because windows was more versatile.

but now mac has made a comeback. i can use this hot ass laptop for all my normal needs nad use my tricked out windows rig for gaming.

perfect.

perfect.

i'm still learning how to use it and i won't have all my software installed still i rendesvous with dad this weekend. but eddie spent a lot of time on ichat video with me teaching me all the tricks of optimization, and asked will help me more tonight/tomorrow.

by the way, it's pure sex.

mike, i adore you and owe you like. lots and lots of cupcakes. if cupcakes mean idol worship.

indeed.

so my ipod nano came today. WEE. i'm so excited, so i went out at lunch and got a case and the nike running kit. WEE.

then i go to charge my ipod for my running date with asked tonight.

no workie.

next computer.

no workie.

make a reservation at apple. go in and show it to them. they tell me it's dead. DOA. d-e-d. i cry.

then they tell me they have none to give me, nor does the store uptown. and because it was bought off amazon, i can't have a new one from the tons they have downstairs. i have to get one ordered in. it will take a day to a week.

so i will pray i get it tomorrow, and stare at the 60$ of nike equipment i just bought, and be annoyed.

yes. i know. i have a shuffle and a video. i KNOW. i am a spoiled brat. but i'm really, really excited about using this nike tracker thing to do a challenge against shackers. super excited. i think it's going to take my workout to a new level of aggression and competition i have yet to attain.

and you will probably see it all posted here.

so i got bored. i haven't cut my hair in like, a year. and it was wicked long. and, because i find that male-dominated gaming forums to be the best place to get hair styling advice, i took a poll on the shack about how i should do my hair, including pictures of how my hair looked now, and different cuts and colors i got in the past.

then i went to dop dop salon in soho, and worked with nicole, who rocks, and got the best cut and color since i was like, 16 years old. and i'm very happy. of course, this hair cut meant i got carded ordering wine on sunday, and my father said i looked like a stupid high schooler... but you know, if it pisses your father off, that probably means you're doing something right.

mike made a nice before and after gallery for me. i love my sexy trying-to-pout look (lol) and also the amazing face i'm making in the last "before" picture. see my hair!

they wrote some haikus about me:

driving a fast car
whether forza or real life
very hard for seacow

No sex for you Mike
My bug is too hard to drive
Will you marry me

flippers on the wheel
let's see chim chim do this
road rage seadonkey!

so last night i spent four and a half hours playing forza, most of them online against shackers.

forza, for those of you who do not live completely in the gaming world, is a racing simulator, probably the best one out there. you can drive almost any car, and the controls are very lifelike.

i haven't played a racing game (save mariokart, which i also suck at) since daytona on the sega saturn. and i was TERRIBLE at that game. but i really, really, REALLY love playing online with people, even if i finish in dead last every time. so i hopped on with multisync, and we created the shortbus squad, racing B class cars (which is middle tier.)

and yes, i was terrible. i rarely finished a race, and often i just had to crash into people because i was scared that avoiding them would make me spin out. and yes, i'm sure most people found it maddening, but i was very apologetic, laughed when they took me out in retaliation, and by god, i CANNOT WAIT TO DO IT AGAIN TONIGHT.

so much fun.

xbox live rules. especially since you have a headset that can make you talk shit as you swerve wildly around the track.

so my friend, felicia, doesn't� have a ton of spare change. a good person gave her a 360, but fedex lost her 20 gig hard drive last week. and she was very sad.

then i found out she didn't have xbox live, or a headset.

so, in secret, i shipped her one.

the happiness of someone getting an unexpected gift is always 1000 times better than receiving a gift of any sort.

i feel a million times better today.

It was understood, therefore someone of shacknews pointed out the translator of Japanese google from beta English. He passed through that Japanese which takes us, and that the post which was reset was nominated to English for the highest making merry noise. Rather than I try that, being able to imagine me it was the gold. So, the proper. I'm which does that for my blog. If you think that we would like to try that, as for link on the bottom, there is here. In addition, �??my original�?? post it is under queer word, before moving that through therefore whether me the translator, orginally it can look at those which are typed. So the pleasure. I before I send out those, think of that me we would like to move my E-mail entirely with this. My father putting me on the straight jacket, before being able, which rank you think? (You! The love which is sounded plunk)

Okay, so someone on shacknews pointed out the english to japanese google translator beta. he recommended we take a post, put it through japanese, then put it back into english for maximum hilarity. i tried it out, and it was more golden than i could ever imagine. so, of course. i'm doing it for my blog. if you want to try it out, here's a link, at the bottom. also, my "original" post is below the gibberish, so you can see what i orginally typed out before running it through the translator.

so much fun. i think i want to run all my emails through this before i send them out. how long do you think before my father got me put in a straight jacket?

(love you pops!)
http://translate.google.com/translate_t?langpair=ja|en

so last night i woke up around 4 am to torrential rain and terrified lightning. loving that sound, i snuggled down happy.

but today i wake up and check the shack before heading off to work and hear that the new york subways are flooded and i'm going to have to walk to work. OH SNAP.

so i got about halfway there and then a cab stops and lets people out. YOINK. i stole that badboy because there is nothing worse than arriving at work sweaty and disgusting.

but seriously. it's like Thunderdome. hordes of people angrily fighting for buses and cabs. apparently the working subways are hysterically dangerous. some dude was fighting and BARKING at another passenger trying to get on a pack train.

barking.

man, i'm going to miss new york.

so last night i had my housewarming shackmeet. pictures of the apartment will be up soon, i promise. the even was good. we had about 17 people here, including ourselves, and played games and chatted. and it was not too crowded!

it's weird to have to stop drinking and sit around and let everyone sober up, but honestly, i'm glad they do that.

by 2 am, everyone had left but chris remo and jake, who stayed talking business with me till... 4.30 am? yeah. when finally i looked at the clock and was like HOLY FUCK and they left.

woke up at 10 and felt like hell. sore throat, stuffy nose, headache, body ache. i'm like, fuckin great. but, we clean up and go to the MOST AWESOME farmer's market ever. like... jesus. 100 or more stalls? so we buy some yummy food, and then i come home and make homemade bacon and eggs and brusselsprouts, and then i passed out because i felt like hell.

i miss sarah, and i miss dad. but i have to say i don't miss my tiny apartment. i miss my old friends, i miss new york partying, but i really love my job and what i'm doing here. i don't relish paying for gas and my car, but i really do like it here.

Wagon tipped over
You lost: food, clothes, ammo, Paul
Fuck him anyway

Coffee Table:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/22059704@N08/sets/72157603498843435/

Side Table:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/22059704@N08/sets/72157603498847449/

Walkthrough of the stages, some stuff omitted:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/22059704@N08/sets/72157603498873729/

i have been told that i have been gloomy lately in my entries. and this is true. i have been pretty gloomy lately. some is irrational. some is not. some will mend. well, all will mend in time, right?

anyway. here's a list of things that are good, and that i am thankful for.

- cats that sleep on my feet
- miso who sits in my lap when i work on the computer
- pancake who has a cute face (we shall add to this later when she does not whine at 6 am, is potty trained, and i am over her chewing through my laptop cord which cost $86 to replace)
- an awesome fucking job
- an awesome fucking bunch of coworkers
- a car that i think is really awesome
- two sisters, a father, and a mother who are really supportive and fun and kind and wonderful
- a group of friends that now pull from real life means so that when i use internet forums, i can use them just to bullshit, and not feel the need to socialize with the people that annoy me there because i have no other friends and/or means to socialize, thusly i have to see them
- being debt free
- having lost some weight and enjoying thoroughly working out
- being an excellent cook and really enjoying it (and having a really awesome kitchen and easy access to barbecuing)
- lots of sunshine and good weather in california
- cheap, amazing wine
- accessible flowers so that i always have blooms on my kitchen table
- an apartment big enough to HAVE a kitchen table
- a farmer's market
- access to a city with all the food i like, and a town with all the takeout i could desire
- a beach within day's driving distance (albeit perhaps shark infested)
- knowledge that, no matter what the hurtles, i am successful, surrounded by loving and supportive people, and saving money, and that each passing day, these things grow stronger, and the goals that i am shaping for my future are becoming more and more real and incredible

in discussing cars on the shack, i found myself advocating the fit again. which, in general, is poopoo'ed by the very secure males that frequent that wonderful forum.

and from that conversation, this quote came out of my fingertips, and i liked it. so i'm saying it here.

"you just have to be comfortable with the fact that your car is not, in fact, your penis."

there is a new website, wordle.net, where you can make word clouds. someone took my most recent 200 posts (75,826 words) and filtered out the curse words, lol, and other non-important words. this is what wordle created as my most frequently typed words on that website.

long story short: a shacker has a girlfriend who makes fleece hats. i live in california, and have no need for a fleece hat, but it was inexpensive and i wanted to support her.

her hats happen to be animals. and i could request a custom animal. so, of course, i chose a meerkat. because that is, of course, the logical thing to do.

below is the result. i even have a comparison shot of me and a meerkat so you can see how uncanny the resemblance is.

if you want your own animal hat, go here: http://www.hideebugdesigns.com/

so i found out my dog has a twitter account today. how? because she started following MY twitter feed, and i got an email about it.

and no, i didn't do it. and neither did mike. and i still think asked might have done it, but he's not online to ask. it's definitely a shacker (prompted by the posts i've made about pan being ill last week, i guess, and her awesome professional pictures.)

i've actually posted back to her a couple times. i am actually referring to this feed as "her" also, which is even more hilarious. my dog is CLEARLY not twittering. she's sitting beside me right now.

this is like when i made that blog for sake. (and that was awesome, by the way.)

anyway, you want to see pancake's twitter? right here. can't imagine it will hang around long, as i bet the shacker responsible will get bored. still, she has 14 people following her. my fucking dog.

oh, internet.

http://twitter.com/PancakeTheDog

so, as you may know, i'm getting married next week. this is rad and all, but what is WAY MORE AWESOME is that i'm getting a full week in maui, sans blackberry and laptop, to do anything in the world i want. it's a gorgeous place, and it's our honeymoon, so i want to have some kick ass pictures. thusly, about two weeks ago, i began my search to figure out what kind of camera we wanted to get.

we had a few options: iphone with a waterproof case when we go in the ocean, point-and-shoot with a waterproof case, waterproof point-and-shoot, or DSLR and some other option of the above.

i went with that last one.


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